A billiards movie that doesn’t tend to provoke much discussion among genre enthusiasts is Billy the Kid and the Green Baize Vampire, a 1987 film from the UK that revolves around a snooker showdown between a cockney named Billy Kid and a seven-time world snooker champion who wears clip-on fangs and relaxes in a coffin named Maxwell Reardon, aka the Green Baize Vampire. Given the two main protagonists are modeled on real-world legends Ray Reardon (whose nickname was “Dracula”) and Jimmy White, who battled it out in snooker championships in the early ’80s, it’s surprising few people talk up this film.
Oh, wait…did I mention this billiards movie is a musical? For many, that may be just enough to make one put away their cue and call it a night. But, before you do, consider:
- If you ever enjoyed The Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975), this billiards movie is a clear tribute, from its overall sheer camp to the tune sung over the final match, which resembles Dr. Frank-N-Furter singing in his laboratory, with the chorus overlooking from the balcony.
- It’s composed by George Fenton, a 5-time Oscar-nominated composer for movies like Gandhi and Dangerous Liaisons.
- It features songs such as “Kid to Break” and “Snooker (So Much More Than Just a Game),” and includes the memorable line, “Heaven’s covered in green baize!” (I mean, really, what pool player out there could hope for anything more?)
Is it a good movie? Meh. The acting is pretty bad, the characters are two-dimensional, and the overall production quality is cheap. But, this could be said about many a great cult movie. As one reviewer wrote, “it certainly is a strange and heady brew that will either find its way to your heart or utterly alienate you.” So, grab something potable of choice, get comfortable, and decide for yourself. Let me know.
For those interested in watching Billy the Kid and the Green Baize Vampire, it is available via Amazon Video On Demand.
